AB and I tried Weight Watchers last year when the cumulative size of our waists had become ridiculous. I recall losing a little weight, but not sticking with the program nor keeping it off (although when I re-registered I discovered that last time I had lost ~12 lbs). Since then my battle with my weight has gone on at a steady rate; I run, I quit running, I diet, I quit dieting, I give up foods, I eat all of those foods in one sitting, let's try running again, rinse and repeat. I have managed to fluctuate within a 10lb range now for several years. Until recently.
This past weekend I was feeling particularly fluffy; I had been sick for the preceding week and hadn't done a lick of exercise other than walk my dog around the neighborhood (and it's more like a slow foot-dragging while he stops and pees on everything). I had also eaten my fair share of cupcakes and been on a few too many beer flights, so I stepped on the scale.
Holy shit. Before anyone thinks "167? Please, that's nothing. And you're tall. Quit being a drama queen" I must point out that I have never weighed that much in my entire life. When AB and I started dating (and I was 28 at the time) I weighed 135lbs. For those who are mathematically challenged, that's a 33lb weight gain during our relationship. I was floored. I was also frustrated, sad, disgusted with myself, and thoroughly disappointed in how far I had let myself go considering I've never had a child, haven't hit menopause, only work 3 days a week, and have a body perfectly capable of physical exertion (not to mention how shallow I am).
The next morning was my first day at work (orientation) so I was required to wear business casual. It only took a few attempts to discover that my size 12 "fat pants" didn't even fit. I had no choice but to suck it in, zip it up, and slouch my way through the day in a pathetic attempt to hide the rolls that had very obviously formed along the sides of my abdomen.
When I got home from work I immediately hopped online and re-registered for another 3 month Weight Watchers membership. I know it failed the first time because of my lack of dedication and self control, but I honestly believe the fat pants experience sealed the deal. Since Tuesday I have been trying to make my 27 points/day allowance work and it's not easy (the more weight you have to lose the more points you get; I'm considered to be close to my "healthy weight range" so I don't get a lot to work with). I've also started back running and using the elliptical, so I pray the combined exercise and low food intake will help this issue out.
My long term goal is to get down to 145lbs. I think back to the times when I weighed that amount, and it was always a healthy weight for me; I wasn't starving but I was comfortable with how I looked and able to carry myself with some pride. It's also a weight that I spent more than a few years at so I don't think it's an unrealistic goal. I'd also be happy with returning to my size 8 frame. I build muscle easily (thanks Mom!) so I could give a little on the weight if only my waistline would cooperate (and I have no desire to spend money on new clothes in bigger sizes!).
This is probably more than most people wanted to know about my body's ability to pack cellulite like a wagon on the Oregon Trail, but getting it out there has always helped my dedication and commitment to something. Wish me luck?