Thursday, December 31, 2009

Well Wishes

I just wanted to get on here and wish everyone a Happy New Year. New year, fresh start, perfect opportunity to make some changes that you're always promising yourself you want to do. I fully intend on taking advantage of that opportunity- and for me it's twice as much of an incentive because I'm turning 30 in two months. So I figure, new year, new decade of life, new opportunities. Here's hoping everyone has an even better year than this past one and accomplishes what they're aiming for.

Wednesday, December 30, 2009

My Personal Year in Review

I did this last year and decided I would do it again this year as a nice sum-up of 2009.

-What was the best thing that happened to me this year? Okay, this is a hard one! I would say getting engaged but we broke up. I would say surviving nursing school, but I already used that for #2. I would say losing weight and getting in shape...but I didn't do that. Hmmm. Alright if I think of something I will come back and update. For now I'll stick with not getting sick and dying.

-What did I do this year that I’m really proud of? I survived my first year of nursing school. I know that may seem silly to many people, but it's hard. The material isn't hard, but the amount of work (busy and useful) involved is insane. But I made it. One more to go.

-Who did I really help? I'd like to think I helped several of my classmates out with class and clinicals. I could be wrong, but I feel like I'm the one that gets asked most questions (haha, like I know what's going on either!) and although I don't know the answer quite frequently, it's nice to be asked anyways.

-Who do I need to thank and acknowledge for having been there for me? My parents of course. Several of the friends I've made in nursing school who have been there with me through the hard and the easy times. Alister for being my best friend despite other "issues". Oh, and Krissy...without her I'd never get to go anywhere b/c of my constantly needy cat with heart problems.

-What are the top three lessons I learned? 1. As with last year, no one should have given me a mortgage. 2. You get back what you put into things. 3. Wedding dresses aren't returnable no matter what the excuse.

-What increased my happiness and joy this year? Prozac. Not kidding. If I'm on birth control pills I gotta be on Prozac too...otherwise I come close to being a serial killer. My few months on the happy pill this past year were...okay so I can't really remember much of it anyways but I know I cared a lot less about, well, everything. Not the end-all solution but it was nice for a while. After a while I decided that just going off bc pills would be more healthy for my body than being on multiple drugs. Antidepressants can raise the risk of developing metabolic syndrome by a TON. It's better this way. Less pharmaceuticals to depend on.

-What’s something I got through that was really tough? Breaking off Alister and I's engagement. Sadly I think it had been building for a little while but the irreconcilable differences got to be more than I could handle. It's just hard because he had been my best friend and it's hard to go from everything to nothing!

-What did I avoid that I must pay more attention to in 2009? Money. I spend it yet I don't have any.

-What character trait did I develop most this year? I'm afraid my stubbornness just got worse. Although being stubborn also leads to determination so I won't knock it this time.

-What new people did I meet that are now in my life? Mainly more people in nursing school. I'm surprised at how capable I am of getting along with girls; it never used to be one of my strong suits. I met a few other people in Greenville (not in school) and they've been fun to hang out with (and their dogs have been good for Stetson to play with).

Sunday, December 27, 2009

RNIA

eating : nothing. just drinking some smart water.

feeling : relaxed. not wanting to start classes just yet.

listening : to the tv. the washing machine. the dryer. the vent on the fireplace.

watching : season 5 of nip/tuck

reading: master your metabolism by jillian michaels and the 2nd book in the southern vampire mysteries series

loving : that it's still the holidays

disliking: being broke yet materialistic

thinking : i really do need to get these applications filled out

hoping : my family makes it to the mountains safely

wishing : i had a million dollars (like always)

Saturday, December 26, 2009

10 in 2010


I got the idea to do a list of 10 things I want to do and/or accomplish in 2010 from another blog I read. I thought it was a neat idea and plan to do an 11 in 2011 on down the road. So here it is, my 10 in 2010:

1. Skydive. It's something I've always wanted to do and Alex and I are scheduled to go February 20th for my 30th birthday. I'm really hoping I don't chicken out, but honestly I don't think I ever would anyways. I've had a lot of friends go and some of them were WAY bigger sissies that me (just saying).

2. Get straight A's. I've only got 2 semesters left of nursing school (not complaining) and I'd really like to accomplish straight A's in at least one of those semesters. I got into nursing school with all A's, I'd like to look like I'm leaving in the same fashion.

3. Lose the weight and get in shape. Since this summer I have gained 25 pounds. Yes, 25 pounds. That's a lot of gain over 6 months, especially since I'm not pregnant nor a binge eater. The plan for the coming year, and something so many people try to do, is to lose those 25 pounds. In addition, I'd like to get back in shape. I used to be able to walk up a flight of stairs without a pounding heartbeat and shortness of breath and by God, I would like to be able to do that again. I feel old and, well, fat, when I can't walk up the steps at school without wanting to die. I'm not even 30 yet; there's no excuse!

4. Relearn to play the piano. Now that I have my late Grandma's baby grand piano, the goal is to relearn to play it. I still know how to read music, but it's been almost 10 years and I'm a bit slower on the uptake this time. My fingers have also grown accustomed to computer keys and not piano keys, and needless to say they're stiff and can't move half as limberly as they once did. That and I have some classical pieces I used to play flawlessly and I'd really like to be able to do those that way once again.

5. Learn at least 1 type of dance. I cannot dance. I have no rhythm. I was in marching band yet I cannot match a beat to save my life...and I have 2 left feet. I would like to learn at least 1 type of dance and do it well; what can I say? Dancing With the Stars got to me as did the in-shapeness of the female dancers.

6. Get comfortable speaking basic medical Spanish. I took 8 years of Spanish in school and now for the life of me cannot understand much past "hola" and "no". I've found in clinicals that many of my patients and their families speak ONLY Spanish. I bought a medical spanish flip guide and borrowed a Learn to Speak Spanish program from my parents. The goal by next fall semester is to be comfortable speaking BASIC Spanish to my patients. It can only help seeing as thought the Hispanic population in NC just keeps growing.

7. Do something adventurous. Aside from skydiving, Alex, Karina, and I will be going on a 9 day cruise in the Western Caribbean this March (cruises are cheap right now!). We have stops in Grand Cayman, Honduras, Beliz, and Mexico. I really want to do something I wouldn't usually do, but since finances are incredibly tight I'm limiting myself to only one or two. We've looked at a zipline adventure in the forests of Beliz and I'm seriously considering one of the "Basic Scuba" courses you can do at any of the locations. Scuba is on my "Bucket List"...really need to start marking things off of it!

8. Complete a nursing externship. All ECU nursing students have the option to do an externship after completing 2 semesters of school. I'm applying to do one at PCMH next summer and am really hoping to get a position in one of my selected areas (surgery, cardio, or ED). Although they pay you to work full time, ECU also manages to charge you tuition so that you can get 3 whole credits which go towards absolutely nothing. Sigh. No wonder so many people skip college...it's too expensive. When I got my first degree tuition was only about $1000 a semester...now it's $2200. Either way, the experience would be invaluable so here's hoping I get the chance.

9. Graduate nursing school. This ones a no-brainer. I'm supposed to be done in December 2010...I WILL be done in December 2010. Period.

10. Get a job. This one is also a no-brainer, although a bit more difficult. They say to get a nursing job right out of school you have to start applying at the beginning of your last semester. I'll be doing that, no doubt, but a lot depends on whether I manage to sell my house or not. I would LOVE to get out of Greenville but I refuse to rent out my house again, so getting a job at Pitt may be my end goal next year if I have to stick around. If I can sell my house (cross fingers) I'd either really like to work at Duke again (hey, great benefits, good pay, top-ranked hospital) or get out of NC for a bit. Again, much depends on the house and also on passing the NCLEX (which will be taken sometime in January).

And that's all...my 10 for 2010. Hopefully I can accomplish all of that and more. I'll be satisfied if I just get those in though~

Friday, December 25, 2009

A Relaxing Day

Today was actually one of the most relaxing Christmases I have experienced in a while. Usually there's a lot of hustle and bustle to get ready for much of the extended family's arrival for dinner and gifts, but today there was only my immediate family and my uncle David. I did miss getting to see everyone else, but not having so much cleaning and preparing to do was also nice. We started the day with apple pie, ice cream, and mimosa's and ended it with "It's a Wonderful Life" by the fire. I can't complain! I was also glad my sister and her husband managed to make it to town yesterday evening (for the candlelight church service...so pretty) and then stay all day today.

My main gift this year was having my (late) Grandma Tripp's piano moved down to Greenville. My house isn't huge but I think the piano fits well in the dining room (I always eat on the sofa or floor anyways).





Very soon after it arrived I started playing it and was pleased to hear that it was still fairly well in-tune. I will have to get a tuner to come out once it adjusts to the humidity of Greenville but until then it sounds good to me. In addition to having the piano moved, I got some smaller, but also wonderful, gifts. A box of skeet, a painting of a horse done by Alex's old graphic design professor, new Smith sunglasses, giftcards, and a variety of yummy munchies in addition to several other great gifts. All-in-all, I can't complain. I just can't wait until I have a job again and can afford to spoil people for Christmas like I used to (although I couldn't really afford it then either...didn't stop me).

Aside from Christmas, things have been going reasonably smoothly. School starts back January 7th so I will be heading back to Greenville early next week to get the house cleaned up and take care of some things before classes get rolling. I'm not looking forward to school, but I've survived one year, I'm assuming I can do the same for this last one!

Oh, and I bought my first fedora at World Market the other day. I had seen pictures of people wearing them and loved them, even though I've never looked very good in hats. This one is a keeper, even if I do look dumb (and the pics below are ones that Alex took- she tried to make them artsy but I'm a difficult subject).


Thursday, December 24, 2009

Merry Christmas

I just wanted to take a second to wish everyone a very Merry Christmas and Happy New Year. I unfortunately haven't had much to blog about since school ended (grades were okay) so this thing is gathering spider webs as usual! Hopefully I have a little more to talk about over the holidays; if not at least I got the well wishes in ahead of time.

Monday, December 14, 2009

RNIA (procrastinating hardcore)

eating : nothing. although i'd love some steak and baked potato right about now.

feeling : stressed yet lazy. last exam tomorrow and i need to study but i don't want to!

listening : to the news on tv. lots of people being shot and robbed. good times.

watching : nothing of importance...my computer screen...should be my pharm book

reading: my pharm book (as soon as i quit messing around on here)

loving : that after tomorrow i'm done with classes for 3 weeks

disliking: being a lazy fatass. seriously, i have no drive to do any exercise and i love to eat bad food

thinking : i really need to study and quit screwing around

hoping : i pass the exam tomorrow

wishing : i had a million dollars

Saturday, December 12, 2009

Finals and then some

Wow, I am so not good at keeping this thing updated! Like my aunt said, it's nice to read when you can get the cobwebs cleared away. Right now I am halfway through my final exams. This semester didn't go near as well as I wanted it to but it's not going to end up too badly. Anything that happened is definitely my fault; I was slack this semester and just didn't try as hard nor study as hard as I did last semester. Next semester I'll be making up for it, no doubt. Back to studying all of the time and having fun none of the time.

As for non-school related news, Alister and I broke up and called off the wedding. We were having irreconcilable differences and it just got to a point where, even if the issues were fixable, they weren't going to be fixed from 2000 miles away. It didn't seem reasonable to get married as soon as he moved back when there were some things that needed to be dealt with. We're still talking- he is my best friend for goodness sakes- and there may be a chance further down the road for us to work things out, but for now we're going to do our own thing (which for the most part is to get through school). It sucked but seems like the best choice for both of us. I am going to hang on to my wedding dress; partly b/c I LOVE it and partly b/c David's Bridal won't let me return it anyways.

I am excited about Christmas break coming up. I did all of my Christmas shopping last night on amazon.com and an thrilled that I don't have to go out and battle the crowds. I also got 48 Christmas cards signed, sealed, and stamped and will hopefully get them to the post office Monday morning. I usually write a Christmas letter to stick in the cards but having not done much over the past year, I didn't want to waste paper to say nothing (besides that's what this blog is for). Maybe next year there will be more to talk about (cross fingers).

I'm trying to figure out if there's anything else I can add in here...oh, I did see my first vaginal delivery in my OB clinical. It was crazy to see and no, I didn't cry. I kind of cringed and held my breath but no tears came to my eyes. I can't imagine why anyone would want to put themselves through that- especially knowing that kids can cost ~$1 million to raise over a lifetime (and I'd like to see that million in my bank account). It was really neat to see though, and believe me I saw everything since I was pushing the girl's leg back every time she pushed. I'm looking forward to Alex and Kris having a baby fetus (although I think I will pass on seeing my sister's vagina in that state).

I also bought a shotgun and learned to properly shoot it. I figured since I live in Greenville and am by myself a good half of the time that I should probably have some kind of home protection other than my overly friendly dog. I considered a security system but I don't want to have to pay for one monthly. Besides, I have found shooting to be really enjoyable and relaxing, not to mention a great (redneck) family bonding experience. Hopefully that's all I have to use it for.

Aside from the stuff above, there's not much else going on. Life just rambles along like it's so good at doing here in thrilling Greenville.

Tuesday, November 10, 2009

Nursing School: A Poem (Part II)

Every time
I want to play
My books remind me
Not today.

Pharm takes hours
Then OB
But my peds book
Is not for me.

Heart defects
Fresh chest tubes
Milk let down
And swollen boobs.

Poking dummies
Suctioning trachs
Kids with croup
And bellyaches.

Pregnant women
Lots of cursing
Red rings of fire
During birthing.

Med-surg patients
Gotta “go”
And when they do
Trust me, you’ll know.

Crying babies
Give them food
Change their diaper
If they’ve pooed.

First time daddies
Oh so scared
First time mommies
Unprepared.

Circumcise
The baby boys
Give the girls
Some silly toys.

Teach and teach
On contraception
Use a condom
Avoid infection.

Get the kids
Their immunizations
Avoid diseases
And hospitalizations.

Many patients
Are way too big
Weightloss is healthy
Eat some figs. (Um…bad rhyming there…)

I try to turn them
Throw my back out
It’s bad technique
I have no doubt.

And when I’m done
Cleaning up poo
There’s always more
For me to do.

Charting vitals
Head-to-toe’s
Where’s the head nurse?
No one knows.

And when I leave
I want a nap
Instead I do
My write up stat.

For even when
I crave some fun
There’s always more
I’m never done.

Wednesday, November 4, 2009

RNIA

eating : nothing. but i really enjoyed my pizza and chocolate chip cookie at the hospital

feeling : tired. it was a long day. and sore. i held a baby for ~4 hours

listening : to the clock ticking, the neighbor's dogs barking, and some commercial on TV

watching : nothing

reading: my NCLEX review book...chapter on problems with labor and delivery

loving : that after friday i have 2 weeks of no tests

disliking: that i've already failed at the running attempt b/c i'm a lazy ass

thinking : i have got a LOT of reading to do in my peds book before the test friday

hoping : the tests go well

wishing : to win the lottery, that it was already christmas time

Wednesday, October 28, 2009

Success

Today I had a clinical on the pediatrics floor at PCMH and was so very proud of myself. For those that don't know me well, I am insanely scared of kids and having to work with them is quite a bit of an anxiety attack for me. That being said, my patient this afternoon was a 9 month old girl with meningitis and a subdural empyema (pus between some layers in her brain). She was adorable despite her large head and tendency to drool more than Alister's dog. The first time I went into the room no one else was in there with her and the nurse popped in right after just long enough to ask me to play with her. Yes, me. Play with a baby.

At first I was scared to touch her (she had tubes and lines everywhere and well, she was a BABY) but when she started to get fussy I gave in and picked her up at which time she promptly shoved the entire end of my stethoscope in her mouth. I finally realized if I talked to her like I do my pets we'd have no problem. She also seemed fascinated with my stethoscope so if it kept her from crying I was good.

The day ended up going really smoothly; her parent's were really friendly and my nurse was great. I even learned to change a diaper and apply butt cream (not kidding, it's called BUTT CREAM). My biggest success though was partially getting over my fear of babies. I definitely don't want to have any but I won't lie; I'm super excited about my sister(s) having some baby fetus'...I can't wait to play with them and spoil them and then send them home when they get fussy or annoying. :-)

Tuesday, October 27, 2009

I'm a blogging failure

I swore to myself that I would try to maintain this blog on a regular basis, but as the few left who still check it can see, I don't do a very good job. Most of the times I get on here these days is to update everything that has happened since the last post...which seems to be about a month before. Sigh.

I guess I'll start with the egg donation thing. I was actually really starting to look forward to the whole process when I was informed that I had "failed" the psych evaluation. Now, I always knew I was a bit crazy (isn't everyone in their own way) but for a stranger who has never met me to tell me that I am not up to their standards was a little off-putting. The couple had picked me out from a website with hundreds of other donors on it and in a second I had some shrink up in MA judging me over a bunch of random questions ie "Do you like reading books on mechanics", "If you could be an artist would you want to paint flowers", and "Do you frequently hear voices in your head that no one else does". And sadly, I "failed" it. Oh well, there's still nursing school (despite the nice little self esteem blow). Guess my eggs just aren't good enough.

On a separate note, I have signed up to try to write a novel in one month starting November 1 through http://www.nanowrimo.org/. Actually, it's a 50,000 word piece of randomness that I'm going to attempt to come up with in 30 days in hopes that somewhere deep inside I'm capable of being an author. I don't have high hopes though since I can't even seem to keep a simple blog up-to-date. I'll TRY to update on here and let my few readers left how it's going.

Nursing school is going okay. Well, I actually despise this semester because it's just one huge, unorganized mess, but I'm just trying to get through it. I found that I actually do not like pediatrics (big surprise there) and that I'm not even that find of obstetrics anymore. I'm really hoping that sometime during these 2 years of torture I can find something I can manage to stand long enough to get into graduate school (and really, I've given up claiming I know what I want to do with that either).

The story of my life can be summed up in 3 words...I don't know.

Friday, October 16, 2009

Oh my eggs...

Recently I received a phone call from an egg donor agency I applied to back when I worked at Duke. A couple had actually chosen ME from a huge list of potential donors to be their egg supplier. I felt flattered. I felt honored. I felt the $5500 compensation would help greatly with paying off some debt. I told her I would do it and the process has begun.

I just finished filling out a 570 question psych evaluation and sometime in the next 2 weeks will fly to Boston to have medical tests done and another psych evaluation completed. If I pass that (cross fingers) I will proceed to being put on birth control to match my cycle with the surrogate's. From there comes the hormone injections and retrieval, but I'm trying to take it one step at a time (and trying not to think about sticking myself with a needle several times a day). The thought of flying to Boston soon just because a couple of strangers want my genes is kind of crazy. Story of my life. :-)

Saturday, September 26, 2009

Nursing School: A Poem

I wrote this for Alister but figured I'd share it here...b/c it's typical me.

I hate to study
Yes I do
I hate to study
And I know you do too.

My books are heavy
My notes are boring
If I read much longer
I'll end up snoring.

Clinical write-ups
Case studies and tests
Quizzes and check offs
I just want to rest!

Smegma and mucus
Discharge you can see
What was I thinking
To want this degree?

Vaginas and babies
IV’s and chest tubes
And if you do a rectal
Don’t forget lots of lube.

Angina and stroke
Diabetes and COPD
That’s a lot of sick people
That I have to see.

TB and pneumonia
MRSA and staph
Scrub your hands hard
Then go take a hot bath.

Vomit and blood
Penises and sores
You never know
What’s behind hospital doors.

Patients that yell
Kids that will bite
Demented grandmas
That wander out of sight.

Charting and charting
I have to look forward to
And funky fluids
Spilling on my nice shoes.

Let’s be honest
It's not really my thing
But I'm doing it anyways
So I can afford all my bling.

Saturday, September 12, 2009

Hmmm

So apparently I have a REALLY hard time keeping this blog updated. School has started back but for the life of me I can't seem to get motivated like I was last semester; it needs to happen soon though before my grades get screwed. Alister and I are doing well despite the fact that we're 2000 miles away from each other. But, we survived last year so this one shouldn't be a problem (cross fingers). Today I spent the afternoon at the river with my parents. They drove down with the kayak and ATV's and we had a fun time (as did Stetson). Tomorrow is going to be a lot of hard work though; 2 tests this week and a lot to catch up on!

Thursday, September 3, 2009

Those Random Updates

Okay so I definitely do a horrible job at keeping up with this blog! I go through phases where I'm really into putting stuff on here and then there are several weeks where nothing gets written. Oh well, I try.

Nursing school started a few weeks ago and already it is overwhelming. There are about the same number of classes as last time, but it's much less organized and straight to the point. It's more "figure it out yourself" going on. I'm not complaining, I just need to adjust.

This weekend I'm heading to Raleigh to potentially buy my wedding dress and Alex and Sam's bridesmaid dresses. We'll see how that goes; I'm incredibly indecisive and I'm afraid I'll pick a dress and then find one I like more...and they are not returnable. What to do, what to do.

Tuesday, August 25, 2009

Random Thoughts by People 25-35

I didn't write these but they're fitting so I'm sharing:

-More often than not, when someone is telling me a story all I can think about is that I can't wait for them to finish so that I can tell my own story that's not only better, but also more directly involves me.

-Nothing sucks more than that moment during an argument when you realize you're wrong.

-I don't understand the purpose of the line, "I don't need to drink to have fun." Great, no one does. But why start a fire with flint and sticks when they've invented the lighter?

-That's enough, Nickelback.

-I totally take back all those times I didn't want to nap when I was younger.

-Is it just me, or are 80% of the people in the "people you may know"feature on Facebook people that I do know, but I deliberately choose not to be friends with?

-Do you remember when you were a kid, playing Nintendo and it wouldn'twork? You take the cartridge out, blow in it and that would magically fix the problem. Every kid in America did that, but how did we all know how to fix the problem? There was no internet or message boards or FAQ's. We just figured it out. Today's kids are soft.

-Sometimes, I'll watch a movie that I watched when I was younger and suddenly realize I had no idea what the f was going on when I first saw it.

-I think everyone has a movie that they love so much, it actuallybecomes stressful to watch it with other people. I'll end up wasting 90 minutes shiftily glancing around to confirm that everyone'slaughing at the right parts, then making sure I laugh just a little bit harder (and a millisecond earlier) to prove that I'm still the only one who really, really gets it.

-I would rather try to carry 10 plastic grocery bags in each hand than take 2 trips to bring my groceries in.

- I think part of a best friend's job should be to immediately cleary our computer history if you die.

-The only time I look forward to a red light is when Im trying to finish a text.

- LOL has gone from meaning, "laugh out loud" to "I have nothing else to say".

- Answering the same letter three times or more in a row on a Scantron test is absolutely petrifying.

- How many times is it appropriate to say "What?" before you just nod and smile because you still didn't hear what they said?

- I love the sense of camaraderie when an entire line of cars teams up to prevent a dick from cutting in at the front. Stay strong, brothers!

- Every time I have to spell a word over the phone using 'as in'examples, I will undoubtedly draw a blank and sound like a complete idiot. Today I had to spell my boss's last name to an attorney and said "Yes that's G as in...(10 second lapse)..ummm...Goonies"

- While driving yesterday I saw a banana peel in the road and instinctively swerved to avoid it...thanks Mario Kart.

- MapQuest really needs to start their directions on #5. Pretty sure I know how to get out of my neighborhood.

-Shirts get dirty. Underwear gets dirty. Pants? Pants never get dirty,and you can wear them forever.

-I can't remember the last time I wasn't at least kind of tired.

-Whenever I'm Facebook stalking someone and I find out that their profile is public I feel like a kid on Christmas morning who just got the Red Ryder BB gun that I always wanted. 546 pictures? Don't mind ifI do!

- Is it just me or do high school girls get sluttier & sluttier every year?

-If Carmen San Diego and Waldo ever got together, their offspring would probably just be completely invisible.

-Why is it that during an ice-breaker, when the whole room has to go around and say their name and where they are from, I get so incrediblynervous? Like I know my name, I know where I'm from, this shouldn't bea problem....

-You never know when it will strike, but there comes a moment at work when you've made up your mind that you just aren't doing anything productive for the rest of the day.

-Can we all just agree to ignore whatever comes after DVDs? I don't want to have to restart my collection.

-There's no worse feeling than that millisecond you're sure you are going to die after leaning your chair back a little too far.

-I'm always slightly terrified when I exit out of Word and it asks me if I want to save any changes to my ten page research paper that I swear I did not make any changes to.

- "Do not machine wash or tumble dry" means I will never wash this ever.

-I hate being the one with the remote in a room full of people watching TV. There's so much pressure. 'I love this show, but will they judge me if I keep it on? I bet everyone is wishing we weren't watching this. It's only a matter of time before they all get up and leave the room. Will we still be friends after this?'

- I hate leaving my house confident and looking good and then not seeing anyone of importance the entire day. What a waste.

-I like all of the music in my iTunes, except when it's on shuffle,then I like about one in every fifteen songs in my iTunes.

-Sometimes I'll look down at my watch 3 consecutive times and still not know what time it is.

-I keep some people's phone numbers in my phone just so I know not to answer when they call.

-Even if I knew your social security number, I wouldn't know what do to with it.

-Even under ideal conditions people have trouble locating their carkeys in a pocket, hitting the G-spot, and Pinning the Tail on theDonkey - but Id bet my ass everyone can find and push the Snooze button from 3 feet away, in about 1.7 seconds, eyes closed, first time every time...

-It really pisses me off when I want to read a story on CNN.com and the link takes me to a video instead of text.

-I think the freezer deserves a light as well.

Sunday, August 23, 2009

Another Attempt

Tomorrow morning I am going to begin another attempt to start running. I've done that many times over the years and never managed to stick with it, mainly b/c running bores the heck out of me. However, I put on a bunch of weight over the summer and running has always been the quickest way to take it off. This time though, I'm going to try starting out "right". All of the books, magazines, and websites recommend starting with a run/walk combination so even though it makes me feel less productive maybe it will make me more likely to stick with it. The goal is to run 30 straight minutes (don't laugh all you runners out there- I'm out of shape!) by the end of October. After that I may try and work my way up...or just stick with that. The only thing I'm dreading is the timing; since I walk Stetson in the evenings, it looks like I'll be an early bird (haha).

Thursday, August 20, 2009

My Summer in Review...

Okay so I haven't done the best job in keeping up with my blog this summer but I try! Since it's late and I still have no desire to write a bunch of nonsense I'll just sum up some of the highlights from this summer (since I need to feel like I had a few rather than just sitting on my bum):
  1. I got 2 A's in summer school
  2. I moved back into my house in addition to putting down laminate and landscaping (hard work but looks damn good)
  3. I (and Alister) set a wedding date, found a location, and arranged for a DJ, wedding planner, minister, and cake baker
  4. I found a wedding dress and bridesmaids dresses (that alone deserves it's own number)
  5. I learned to wake board (going in and out of the wake will come in the future)
  6. I bought jeans without holes (seriously, this is something to be proud of...I was going to wear those stupid holey $200 jeans until they dry rotted)
  7. I helped Alister drive back across the country without ANY road incidents (plus for me- I'm bad luck on the road)
  8. I rediscovered the joy of Prozac
  9. I learned to survive not taking off my engagement ring every single time my hands had to get wet (which came after several "oh crap where did I put it???" and "um...I think I left it on the boat at the lake...")
  10. I saved money on my car insurance by not switching to Geico

And here's a list of the things I wanted to do but didn't manage to this summer:

  1. Go on a cruise (damnit)
  2. Repaint my house (well, I hate painting)
  3. Go skydiving (I'm still holding out hope)
  4. Win the lottery (still waiting on that one too)
  5. Get a new car (haha)

Maybe next summer...

Monday, August 10, 2009

Last week

Today begins the last week I have with Alister until he leaves for Colorado. Unfortunately, I won't get to see him again until Thanksgiving since we have to meet with the wedding planner. Long distance sucks...sigh.

This past weekend we went up to Kerr Lake and spent time with Alister's parents. I got to do some wakeboarding and Alister did a lot of skiing. It was an enjoyable time, yet also kind of sad since we won't be able to go back up until (most likely) next year. The lake is incredibly peaceful, relaxing, and pretty...the complete opposite of nursing school!

This week is going to be spent finishing things up, getting the rest of my things unpacked, and getting cleaned up for my new roommate. Oh the life an adult.

Sunday, August 2, 2009

The Wedding Date (no really, the real one)

Kill Devil Hills, NC
May 21, 2010

Whew!

The laminate is DOWN (and looks good).

I am moved back into my house...completely.

I have fill dirt for the holes in the back yard.

Alister and I have chosen a date, a location, and most of that other "stuff".

Thank GOODNESS!

Friday, July 24, 2009

Long week

Today begins 8 straight days of packing, cleaning, moving, pulling up carpet, laminating floors, mowing lawns, digging up trees, and throwing down grass seed. Although it sucks to have adult responsibilities, I'm actually excited to be moving back into my house. I kinda missed living in MY OWN house! But still, there's a lot of work to be done; I'm thankful that my mom, dad, Alister, and Alex will be around to help. Update to follow later in the week.

Wednesday, July 22, 2009

Haiku

Oh oxycodone
You take all my pain away
Yet make me itchy.

Little Bastard #3

Yesterday morning at ~3am I woke up with an ache down below. My first thought was "Oh crap, I have a UTI". So I proceeded to go downstairs, pee in a cup, and dip a test strip (for UTI's) in it. The results weren't very clear, probably because the strips expired a few years ago (so not helpful). I eventually went back upstairs, hoping that the slight pain would disappear by morning.

Around 4am, the pain had spread...specifically towards my right lower back area. It was a dull ache that radiated down towards my pelvis and right hip. I got out the heating pad. The pain got worse. Having had 2 kidney stones in the past, I had an inkling that this could be #3...but it was easier to be in denial and think I had one hell of a UTI.

By 5am the pain was bad enough that I couldn't fall asleep or get comfortable. I was also getting up every 15 minutes to use the bathroom, even though there wasn't much happening once I was in there (I know, TMI). By this time Alister was getting concerned and whipped out his laptop to see if the ER here took my insurance. I felt bad because he has to get up for work at 6am, so I tried my hardest to ignore the pain and go to sleep.

When 6am came, I was still awake and in quite a bit of pain. We agreed that I should go to student health as soon as they opened at 7:30; Alister offered to stay home from work (huge sacrifice) and take me. At 7am I got up to get ready and the pain was pretty unbearable. I walked...sort of...back into the bedroom and remember kneeling by the bed and starting to cry- I didn't want to move any more. That's the point where we decided the ER might be a better option.

Alister drove me over to the ER at 7:30 and we managed to walk right in, check in, go through triage, and be in a room within 5-10 minutes. It was amazing; Rex was never even remotely close to being that quick! The wait for the doctor in the room felt like it lasted forever, but most likely it was only another 5-10 minutes. Once she came and got my history, she told me they'd get me some pain meds and then take a urine sample when I was ready.

The nurse came in with an IV and for one of the first times in my LIFE, found my vein on the first try and got everything going. She was going to give me 2 pain meds and an anti-nausea one. She started with Dilaudid, which is about 10x stronger than morphine. I don't remember what she gave me after that because I kid you not, that stuff kicked in while she was only halfway through pushing it into my IV. I smelled and tasted plastic, my legs and head got heavy, and my pain just disappeared. I didn't believe it, Alister didn't believe it, but by God I felt damn good (minus the itchiness I have whenever I get narcotics).

We were stuck in the room for several more hours, mainly because I couldn't feel my bladder muscles enough to make myself do a urine sample. When I finally did (after standing up numbly and jumping in place) the nurse took the sample and I relaxed in the bed while Alister watched Saved By the Bell. The doctor came in about a half an hour later to let me know that I didn't have an infection, but that my urine was full of blood (sorry, more TMI). She said it was most likely another kidney stone (sigh) and that she'd give me pain meds so I could go home and pass it. Hello Little Bastard #3.

Alister and I left the ER at 11am and went ahead and ran some errands since I couldn't feel jack anyways. We went and measured the flooring at my house, ordered the laminate, got my prescriptions, and went by Lowe's for the carpeting. Upon arriving back at home later in the day, I still couldn't feel anything so I attempted to go to sleep, only to be getting up every 15 minutes to pee. This time though, I peed a LOT...which I'm hoping means the stone cleared on out and wasn't stuck anymore. I took an oxycodone when I went to bed last night and as of right now haven't felt pain since. The last 2 stones took a week each to pass; if this one is already out I will be beyond thankful.

I know I just typed a lot of nonsense above, but I always like to hear about other people's experiences with various issues in hopes that if I ever have the same thing occur that I will have an idea of what is wrong and what to do. So, if anyone ever wakes up with pain in their groin, an urgency to pee, and severe pain in the lower back...you just might have a kidney stone. If you have a fever, blood in your urine, and can hardly stand up from the pain...you most likely have a kidney stone. Go to the ER. They're the only ones that will give you a strong enough pain reliever. No joke, Dilaudid is my hero.

Monday, July 20, 2009

Crazy Dreams

I have crazy dreams. Lots of people say that, but in my case it's true. Ask Alister. I wake up remembering them and they are all over the place. Let me give an example...

I had a dream the other night in which Alister had a truck...not a regular truck but one that had tires that were the size of a car themselves. He wanted me to move it and it had a bunch of random buttons on the right side of me. Reverse was a button. Some of his friends were there to show me how to drive it, but I quickly managed to get it rolling on my own. I pulled it into a random driveway and the reverse button got stuck. Once I got it in reverse I drove it to my parents' imaginary house where I parked it down a small road next to some construction and to the left of a large pit. I walked into the front yard and met my sister and some other people and we walked across the street and went into a museum.

I don't remember what kind of museum but there were lots of gift shops and we went into all of them. We walked back across the street to my parents' "house" and my mom, Alex, and I were sitting on a screen porch that was on the second story. The screen porch stretched from their house to their neighbor's house. I told my mom they should sell the house as one huge one now that they were connected. She said bad idea. Some of the screens were loose and blowing in the wind. Alister shows up while I'm on the porch with my mom and Alex. Mom is helping me tie something on my clothing when Alister starts slurping (literally) on Alex's face. I get mad because he's cheating on me with my sister. Alex and my mom disappear and I'm yelling at Alister while he's refusing to answer or look at me.

I storm inside and slam the door into a random bedroom (mine in the dream). I'm really pissed and walk back out into the living room. There are a bunch of people sitting around (can't remember) and Alister is sitting on the couch with my mom. I demanded to know why he was still there after what he'd done and my mom tells me I need to calm down. She offers me her Rav-4 to take to drive back to my house. I take the keys and storm out the front door. Next thing I know a guy's voice yells "WAKE UP" and I sit bolt upright in bed (in real life). End dream.
I'm telling everyone, I have crazy dreams. And I remember them. That's the craziest part. Lots of people forget their dreams but I have incredibly vivid memories of each and every one. The one above is only slightly crazy. I can't decide whether it's my meds causing them, whether my brain is making up for not thinking all day, or whether I have a brain tumor. I prefer to go with the first or second option. Regardless, I rarely ever wake up feeling rested; an unfortunate result of having an overactive imagination. I've always wanted to write a book but if I tried to use my dreams it would never be published. I would just get admitted to a mental institution.

Friday, July 17, 2009

Snoring...

...b/c my life is so boring....

Okay well it's not that bad. I just feel useless because I'm not working. That will go away in 1 month when school starts again full force. I'm looking forward to it; something to do!

Today I'm going to meet the carpet installers at my house to have measurements done. Hopefully everything will go smoothly and I will be able to order my carpet and laminate flooring this week. Although I hate that the house is in a less than desirable condition post-tenant, it did give me an excuse (and money) to put in laminate. I've always wanted less carpet; it gives my cats less to puke on and stain. I think everything will look nice once it's all done, especially since I have professionals helping (aka Dad and Alister). The yard battle will be undertaken once all of the inside things are finished; I need to dig up a destroyed tree (tear), add a load of dirt, and get some grass planted. Again.

In addition to the house stuff, I have started packing for my move in a week. I'm trying my hardest to get rid of more stuff so that I have less to move. It's hard though; I'm emotionally attached to everything for some reason or another. On the other hand, I hate moving boxes so maybe that will overcome the separation anxiety.

Along with packing Alister and I are going to Atlantic Beach tomorrow to look at potential wedding spots, and then my mom, Alex, and I are driving down again next week to meet with actual planners. I really hope to have things set up before Alister leaves and school starts so I don't have to deal with it. I'm not much of a wedding person but Alister wants one, and being that I love him and want him to be happy, I am foregoing Vegas and giving him one (pat on back).

The joys of being an adult. Sigh.

Wednesday, July 15, 2009

Harry Potter

Like my previous post said, Alister and I went to see "Harry Potter and the Half-Blood Prince" last night at midnight. According to reporters, the movie grossed $22.2 million in sales for just last night, beating out every other movie but the 3rd Star Wars. I'm not surprised; the theater last night was full and there were 4 screens open. We went early- around 11pm- and the room we were in was already 3/4 full by then.

As for the movie itself, it was definitely entertaining and funny (more so than most of the others) but I have to admit I was fairly disappointed. I re-read book 6 a week ago and although I understand things need to be cut out for time, I think a bit much was cut out and and random scenes were added that were never in the book. Being the Harry Potter nerd (and book nerd)that I am, it made the movie a bit more frustrating for me than for others. I would go into all the differences (which Alister and I talked about last night...b/c I'm a nerd and he's nice enough to listen to me) but most people that read this don't read the books, so it doesn't matter! I do recommend the movie though; pretty scenery, lots of humor, and plenty of snogging. Just ignore the fact that the actress playing Ginny Weasely is horrible.

Tuesday, July 14, 2009

Nerdy Excitement

Tonight "Harry Potter and the Half-Blood Prince" comes out in the theaters (at midnight of course) and being the excited nerd that I am, I bought the tickets online a week ago. I recently re-read book 6 just so I'd remember what happened in it so needless to say, I can't wait. I know a lot of people don't like Harry Potter and there's even quite a few that think it's a form of "satanism" (seriously???), but for me, it's just another entertaining series like Lord of the Rings (my all time favorite).

I will let those who are interested know how it is...

Sunday, July 12, 2009

Wedding Date

Although Alister and I set the wedding date to 6/19/2010, we decided to move it up a week due to the fact that Father's Day is on the 20th. So, the new date is June 12, 2010. The location is still TBD but we're leaning towards Atlantic Beach rather than Oak Island b/c Oak Island lacks a bit in accommodations! Besides, Alister proposed to me on Atlantic Beach so it has some meaning. Updates to follow in the future :-).

Saturday, July 11, 2009

Good week

This past week I went to Oak Island with my mom and Alex. We were lucky enough to enjoy 4/5 days of gorgeous weather (the prettiest of course being the day we left) so we were able to spend a lot of time out on the beach. Stetson definitely is a beach dog- he will run around on the sand and sleep under the umbrella for hours and hours. For some crazy reason he has always loved chased splashing water; the ocean was no exception.

Alex and Mom brought their canoe and kayak down and we managed to haul them both to the Intercoastal Waterway for a little while. Mom worked on paddling her kayak while Alex and I paddled around in the canoe with Stetson. Before we left I took a shot at the kayak...with Stetson in tow. If he doesn't get on the kayak, he comes swimming out in to the waterway after it.

Thursday was mom's birthday so we went down the island to the Fish House for some fresh seafood. It wasn't quite as good as Provisions, but the line there was incredibly long (it didn't help that it was so rainy that day). Regardless, Thursday and the rest of the week ended up to be very relaxing. I think my mom and I made some progress with the wedding plans, but we still have no idea what we're doing overall. Considering this is me, it's not a surprise. I came back to Greenville yesterday and today Alister and I are watching a Harry Potter marathon...Tuesday night at midnight movie #6 opens. Yay (huge grin)!

**All pictures taken by Mrs. Alexandra Browning

Monday, July 6, 2009

And...another update

This past weekend I went to Kerr Lake (again) with Alister. His best friend Jeffrey and his wife Christina came up and we had a very enjoyable time. We spent a good bit of time on the Pontoon boat and ski boat; I'm trying to get better at wakeboarding since I'm not really good at any water sport. I managed to stay up when Alister turned the boat- that's a big deal for me since I never managed it on water skiis. Overall we ate a lot of good food, had fun on the lake, enjoyed a huge bonfire and s'mores, and witnessed a fireworks fiasco.

We drove back to Greenville last night and this morning I headed down to Oak Island to meet my mom, Alex, and Stetson. It started out rainy but by the time we got out on the beach there was a nice breeze and just a few clouds in the sky. The water was warm but slightly rough. Around dinner time we came back to the house and I cooked pizzadillas for dinner. They weren't as good as the ones Christina made at the lake, but I never claimed to be a good cook. Oh, and I introduced my mom and sister to the words "smegma" and "splooge".

Thursday, July 2, 2009

Brief Update

Went to the lake last weekend with Alister and Alex...learned to wakeboard but not before busting my lip open from hitting the water face first at 20mph (not to mention the muscle soreness that followed).

Went to see Transformers II with Alister and thought it was really good; definitely funnier than the first one. Tried out a new wings place near the movie theater...note: the honey BBQ and Peanut Thai are damn good.

Finished summer school with 2 A's. Yay me.

Harrison has started pooping on the rug...at first when I was out of town and now today right in front of me. It's very frustrating (not to mention gross) b/c he's never done it before. Going to try some different things with the litter and box before hauling him to the vet.

Went to the doctor yesterday and he added another medication on to my current ones. Not too thrilled b/c I'm not in to taking a bunch of prescription drugs. That and I got a whopping 2 hours of sleep last night b/c I felt like I had drank 5 lattes (and I don't drink caffeine for a reason).

Alister and I set a wedding date: 6/19/2010. Most likely it will be at Oak Island if not somewhere on the Outer Banks. We're keeping it local so family can come but it will probably be a small wedding b/c neither of us want a huge one anyways. That and we're aiming for casual and barefoot with dogs in the wedding party.

Tomorrow Alister and I are going back to his family's lakehouse for the weekend and then I'm meeting up with Alex and my mom at Oak Island on Monday. Hopefully this next week will be relaxing b/c when I return I have a LOT of packing and cleaning to do before moving back to my house.

Tuesday, June 23, 2009

RNIA

eating : nothing...but looking forward to my PB&J and soy yogurt for lunch.

feeling : tired. 45 minutes on the wii fit wears me out.

listening : to obama talk on all 10 channels that i receive.

watching : the computer screen.

reading: a horrible nursing research book. last day of it though- the final exam is tomorrow.

loving : my pets and psodl.

disliking: that i'm too lazy to get up and run at 6am.

thinking : i hate money. north korea is like a much larger version of the columbine shooters. i should not have eaten that damn good ice cream last night.

hoping : my grandparents are doing okay. psodl and i work things out. i lose weight with the wii fit.

wishing : to win the lottery...like always.

Thursday, June 18, 2009

Well...

I haven't been updating this thing much recently b/c, to be honest, I don't do much these days. Alister works Monday thru Friday and I spend the day at home cleaning, reading, doing schoolwork, using the Wii Fit, and playing on the internet. Sounds thrilling right? No, not really. But I keep telling myself that the hell of nursing school will start again sooner than I'd like and the chance to do any of the above will quickly disappear. I do hope to get some more mini-vacations in this summer but other than that nothing major is planned.

I did start seeing a therapist at ECU for some things and I really enjoy talking to her. I've always been a fan of therapists; it's a completely neutral person who will sit there and listen to you bitch and moan until you feel better. Who can complain about that? She also referred me to the school's psychiatrist and yes, once again, I am on happy pills (ie Prozac). They boosted me up once many years ago-maybe that will happen again. It's been rough recently.

This weekend looks promising. Tomorrow Alister and some friends of mine are getting together to make sushi (cross fingers against food poisoning). Saturday we're heading to Raleigh to spend time with our respective families for Father's Day and will return to thrilling, super-humid G-Vegas on Sunday. Hopefully it's an enjoyable, safe weekend for everyone and their dads.

Thursday, June 11, 2009

RNIA

eating : nada.

feeling : lazy as always.

listening : to LOST season 1 on DVD

watching : LOST season 1...currently Sayid and Locke talking about Boone dying.

reading: Pride and Prejudice and Zombies

loving : the thought that the end of summer school is only a few weeks away

disliking: the price of digital cable. Suddenlink is a rip off.

thinking : i need to get this assignment done so i can go to the beach Sunday.

hoping : my Grandma is doing okay.

wishing : to win the lottery...like always.

Monday, June 8, 2009

The Weekend

I went home to Raleigh for the weekend and had an enjoyable time with family. My Grandma Tripp's memorial service was Saturday morning followed by a surprise party for my cousin Vern. It was a nice service and an enjoyable party so no complaints! There was a lot of good food served and a lot of visiting that hadn't been done in a while. Sunday started off with Eggs Benedict and Mimosa's followed by more visiting. It was nice to see all of the family despite the circumstances!

After everyone left (except for Edwin) Sunday afternoon I finished up my horrible paper on stem cell research and nursing (no connection...seriously) and sent some time visiting. Edwin's very frustrating to watch movies with although it was nice to finally visit with him (b/c I always loved spending time with him growing up).

Today Mom, Alex, and I drove to Winston Salem to visit Grandma, Grandpa, Pat, and Joyce. It was a nice visit but I wish Grandma were doing better. We had an a yummy lunch at Red Lobster and my parmesan crusted Tilapia was excellent. I returned to Greenville this evening and am back to hardcore schoolwork through June 24. Hopefully that goes quickly!

Saturday, May 30, 2009

Rutting

I don't have anything interesting to write about currently. It was a hectic week last week and as of right now I have a book to finish for class, a quiz to take, discussion board questions to answer, 2 papers to write, a fiance to entertain, and pets to spoil all before I head back to Raleigh on Thursday morning. Sigh. Huge sigh.

I am looking forward to seeing family next weekend even though it's for Grandma Tripp's memorial service. I feel like I've gotten into a rut down here...mainly from summer school and having no job...so any change of scenery is nice. Hopefully Alister and I can get to the lake and beach sometime in the near future also. I think he's bored out of his mind too.

Saturday, May 23, 2009

RNIA

eating : nothing, just drinking some Crystal Light lemonade

feeling : lazy. super duper extra lazy

listening : to Indy purr and some random John Travolta movie on TV

watching : my computer screen (what else can I be watching if I'm typing on here???)

reading: The 13 1/2 Lives of Captain Bluebear...cute book. Odd

loving : not having clinicals right now

disliking: this gut I've started acquiring

thinking : I need to start writing my thesis and finding research articles

hoping : that the automatic litter box gets here before I go to Raleigh in 2 weeks. I love amazon.com but the free shipping can be really slooooooow

wishing : for rain...then I won't feel so lazy

Wednesday, May 20, 2009

First Day

Today was my first day of class- well, and 1 of only 4 class meetings I actually have this summer so yay, there's only 3 more to go! The class is taught by one of my favorite teachers but sadly even she cannot make it even remotely interesting. We spent the entire 3 hours talking about APA formatting and correct grammar. Sigh. It was bringing back some unpleasant nostalgia...from my last scientific writing and research class at NCSU.

In this class we have several quizzes and small assignments in addition to 1 large research paper. I was hoping the topics would be free choice but instead, we had to pick from a list based on a number we drew from a bag. With my luck, I didn't get to choose until the near end. My topic? Nurses roles in embryonic and stem cell research. I was drawn to the stem cell part; only after I chose it did I get the full part: nurses roles. Well crap. What the hell do nurses have to do with stem cell research? I don't know and neither does the internet. This should be fun.

I don't have any other complaints about the class though; there's mostly people I knew from class last semester and the rest of the writing assignments seem fairly easy and straightforward. I thought it was nice that our professor told us she handpicked us for her class (since she had the job of assigning all 200+ students to the 2 summer classes we have to take) so I wasn't surprised to notice that everyone in there did really good in her med-surg class!

After class I ran some errands (including buying a bunch of 2 cent stamps) and then came home to do some reading. Okay, lots of reading. I haven't even started on writing- for either class. Around 5 I decided to take the dogs on a walk (since Alister was at work) and that turned into one of the worst dog walking experiences ever. Needless to say- after an hour of trying to CATCH the dogs- they are on the back patio and will stay there until I can stand to look at them again. They may have ruined any chance of me ever walking the 2 of them alone again.

Hopefully the rest of the evening will be relaxing b/c I have a lot of writing to do tomorrow.

Tuesday, May 19, 2009

RNIA

eating : a peanut butter and banana sandwich on whole wheat

feeling : worn out, unenthusiastic, tired

listening : to my dishwasher. something is wrong with it. it sounds like a war scene from a movie.

watching : my computer screen

loving : that the house doesn't smell like animals

disliking: that Rite Aid sold out to Target and now my bc pills are costing me through the roof again; the absurd books I'm having to read for summer school and the absurd price they're charging me to take online classes

thinking : i really need to start reading for class

hoping : that Grandma will get better. that summer school will be semi-easy and over quickly. that Alex and I can plan a trip at the end of the summer before she moves off to be a wife (for real). that this summer will be better than it has so far (lots of bumps and potholes).

wishing : that i could win the Powerball and stop having to get private and federal loans (i'm probably going to wish for those permanently)

Sunday, May 17, 2009

Another weekend ends

I decided last minute on Saturday that I would make the short (yet usually eventful) drive to Raleigh. When I got to town I went and picked up Sam and we got lunch and ran some quick errands. Afterwards we went back to my parents house and watched Sweet Home Alabama (always a good movie). Later in the evening I drove over to Grant and Andrea's house in north Raleigh for some grilled hamburgers and hot dogs. It was nice to finally meet Andrea since we read each other's blogs regularly! Justin aka Coochie and Scott also came for dinner and it was nice catching up.

I didn't stay late- what can I say? I'm old, I need my sleep! So I made the loooong drive back to Garner and arrived in time to talk a bit with Sam before going to bed. This morning I got up and took her back to her apartment so she could meet up with friends to go to a new church and then headed over to Alister's parents house for some breakfast. I got in a nice visit with them while Alister spent another few hours in bed sleeping (him and his dad didn't get back from the AllStar race until 3:15am). We tried to go to The Flying Biscuit at Cameron Village but the wait was 30 minutes (despite plenty of empty tables) so we ended up at IHOP. Always a winner- I LOVE their apple cinnamon cream cheese stuffed french toast. Guilty pleasure.

The rain started pouring so I hung around my parents house for a little while longer and then met up with Alister to make the wet drive back to Greenville. The rain held off for the most part although the wind was incredibly gusty. Yay for driving and not getting hit (or hitting something else). Regardless, it was a nice little visit home even though my parents and Alex are in Salt Lake City. I'll probably see them again when I go back for Grandma Tripp's memorial service June 6.

Summer school starts Tuesday, and although the classes are mostly online, I decided to take both at the same time so I think I may be slammed with work. Both classes are writing intensive so that should keep me busy. I'm also trying to plan a visit to Winston Salem to visit with my grandparents- hopefully sooner rather than later!

Wednesday, May 13, 2009

Haiku II

Cheap trip
Must go on
Bonding time
See new places
Short break
Before more poo
Crossing fingers

RNIA...

eating : nothing. but looking forward to the pasta with mushrooms, chicken, and spinach later this evening

feeling : lots of things. it's a manic kinda week

listening : to some stupid soap opera running in the TV and the dogs scratching at the back door

watching : my computer screen

loving : that i have no school for another week

thinking : i need to come up with better things to write about on this blog

hoping : that Alister finds a job. that Grandma will get better. that Alister can sell the AllStar tickets so we can save some money. that summer school will be semi-easy and over quickly. that Alex and I can plan a trip at the end of the summer before she moves off to be a wife (for real).

wishing : that i could win the Powerball and stop having to get private and federal loans

Tuesday, May 12, 2009

Update Haiku

Finished school. Did okay. Still can't stand nursing.
Went to the beach. Ate a lot of seafood. Got some sun. Drank margaritas.
Waiting for summer school to start next week.
Spending time with Alister. Getting used to slobbery doggy. Getting Alister used to spoiled Stetson.

That's all I've got.

Monday, May 4, 2009

Almost there

Today I finished up my 3 "hard" exams so that has been a big weight off of my shoulders. I still have patho and professional nursing...but I can literally fail the patho exam and still do good and prof nursing, well, that class leaves much to be desired. DOn't get me wrong, I still plan on studying all day today and tomorrow, but I'm not hardly as stressed as I have been for the past few weeks.

On another note, Alister came to Greenville yesterday so that was a very nice treat. He left Durango on Saturday morning and made it to NC yesterday evening. He had planned on staying in Raleigh until Thursday to help his dad and let me study for exams but we decided he should come down for a quick visit and drop off all of his stuff. Thank goodness he's in nursing school; it was a big help in the studying last night!

The only plans I have this week are to finish exams, get the house spotless (for the first time in 6 months), and hopefully take a weekend trip to the beach for our anniversary. Oh, and maybe find a job. I miss working. Seriously. It makes me feel like a contributor to society rather than a drain on it.

Friday, May 1, 2009

Right Now I Am (instead of TGIF)...

I'm just going to do another right now b/c I have absolutely nothing to put on my TGIF post. Exams are currently underway; yesterday's was awesome, today's was a bomb. I have 3 more next week. My roommate moved out yesterday and that was a huge weight off of my shoulders. Although she was a nice girl, I ended up living with her AND her douchebag boyfriend, and to be quite honest, at 29 years old I was not looking to have an early-20's couple as roommates (especially since the male half wasn't paying for anything or cleaning up after himself). That and he used up a LOT of hot water, refused to take his shoes off in the house (I vacuumed up mucho dirty foot tracks), harassed my cat, and wouldn't put the toilet lid down (so Harrison wouldn't fall in). And did I mention that he was a slob and incredibly disrespectful? Yeah, so glad that's over. Anyways, all I will be doing all weekend is studying so...yay?

eating : a fresh cut turkey sandwich on whole wheat and some green grapes.

feeling : still tired, worn out, and stressed. and after the exam today there's a touch of disappointment.

listening : to Roseanne on TV before I get my bum up to go study outside in the sun and Indy cleaning himself.

watching : my computer screen. soon to be my foundations notebook.

loving : again, the weather. it's so warm and nice out...finally!

thinking : school sucks. especially nursing school. I knew I'd hate it, I just underestimated how much.

hoping : that I do better on next week's exams than I did on the one today.

wishing : for the end of the semester to come quicker. for Alister and Baer to get here. for fondue-due at the beach next weekend. that my Grandma and Grandpa are going to be okay. to win the powerball.

Thursday, April 30, 2009

Right Now I Am...

(yes, I "borrowed" this idea from someone else!)

eating : nothing currently. although I'm thinking about some whole wheat spaghetti with meatballs and mushroom sauce and garlic bread for dinner...

feeling : tired. worn out. stressed. and it's only the second day of exams.

listening : to the fan blow, my dog bark in his sleep, and my cat snoring by the window.

watching : my computer screen. soon to be my health assessment notebook again.

loving : the weather. it's so warm and nice out...finally!

thinking : i need to quit procrastinating and study.

hoping : that the exam tomorrow goes as well as today's did.

wishing : for the end of the semester to come quicker.

Monday, April 27, 2009

A Break From Poo

Today was my last day of clinicals for 4 MONTHS and I could not be happier. I actually ended up liking most of my patients, but I felt like we were being used as glorified CNA's and by February the learning curve was going downhill drastically. My patient today was an older woman who weighed 83 lbs and had just had a grand-mal seizure and a CVA (stroke). Luckily she was alert and able to talk so it wasn't too bad- and she was incredibly nice; it was just odd having a patient that I could pick up and move myself b/c most of the patients have been a bit heavier. She was definitely a patient I enjoyed talking to more- and she told me I was one of the nicest nurses she had ever met (see, I CAN be nice!) and that I didn't look anywhere near 29. I hope she ends up okay. As for clinicals in general, the entire experience this semester was helpful; I just think that I've had enough poo for just a LITTLE while. My clinical instructor also did my final evaluation and surprisingly I did quite well; I'm glad she noticed and it wasn't all for nothing.

Exams start Thursday and I'm not too concerned. There are a few I need to do well on but I spent so much time this semester learning everything that now it's just more of a review rather than a last minute cram. They're all done next Wednesday and then I have a few days before Alister and Baer come...yay! This summer should be an experience!

This evening I took Stetson over to the pond by Pitt Community College and he actually jumped in after a stick...and brought it back! Several times! I was so proud- he may be a bit of a water dog yet. It takes a while to get him dried again but the pond is fairly clean and well kept so he doesn't reek like he used to after chasing ducks at the med school. I'm just happy he got some exercise; we walked for about 30 minutes and he swam for another 15 so he should be fairly pooped out tonight.

Friday, April 24, 2009

TGIF II

Okay, so I haven't posted lately because I've been incredibly busy and yet on the flip side, not much has happened. So here are the highlights...
  • Sunday- I studied
  • Monday- I had clinicals (luckily no poo this week) and then studied
  • Tuesday- I had my final check off in health assessment which has yet to be graded, but if I have to do it again I wouldn't be surprised. We had to draw a system out of a bag and then do a full assessment on someone else including documentation afterwards. I drew the only system I couldn't remember well...neurological. After that I had my last foundations lab...yay...then came home and, you guessed it, studied
  • Wednesday was my day of 2 big tests (the last 2 tests in two of my main classes). I did good on one, not so good on the other (b/c no matter how much I study I'm retarded in foundations). Then home to study which wasn't well accomplished b/c I fell asleep on my patho notes
  • Thursday- Got up early and went to the library to attempt to study for patho one more time. I hate renal. If there had been a bunch of questions on kidney stones I would have felt more prepared. There was not. It's okay, I got a 104 anyways. Yay patho. Once back home I sat down to BS one of the stupidest papers I've ever had to write. I'll never be able to write a novel; I can hardly come up with a 3 page paper
  • Today I had my last 2 classes of the semester and turned in the horrible paper. Hopefully my professor will still grade me well, b/c despite the content I think I have better grammar than the current generation of texters (who in turn write as if they're texting) and maybe it will just READ better than the others. As for the rest of the day, I'm taking it easier b/c tomorrow starts hard core study for finals next week

I was hoping to go to Raleigh tomorrow to visit with my aunt and uncle but I just have too much to do for finals so I'm going to attempt responsibility and stay here...in the library. Speaking of studying, there is a girl in my clinical group that drives me crazy sometimes. Now I have the utmost respect for anybody and everbody's religions, mainly b/c I have labeled myself agnostic lately, but sometimes I think people go a little overboard. Skip to said girl. She's a really nice, friendly person but she is VERY Christian. There's nothing wrong with that, except that she truly believes that when she does bad on a test, it's b/c God has better plans for her; when she does well on a test, she's glad she puts her faith in God. Sometimes I want to shake her and tell her that GOD DOESN'T AFFECT YOUR GRADES, STUDYING DOES. There's nothing wrong with having strong beliefs, but sometimes you have to jump back to reality and take responsibility for your own actions and decisions, b/c even if God loves you, he doesn't grade your tests. Just a fact.

Anyways, that's all I've got. The weather is supposed to be gorgeous this weekend ie hot and sunny so I plan to do some studying outside while getting some sun at the same time (with no less than SPF30 on mind you).

Saturday, April 18, 2009

Lazy Saturday

Today was fairly enjoyable even though I got very little accomplished. After waking up late from some very unsettling dreams (I have a lot of those lately...I don't think I sleep deeply enough) I popped in a DVD of the last season of Scrubs and proceeded to veg in my bed through the entire 2 1/2 hours. I finally got my lazy butt up, took Stetson on a walk, showered, and then set myself up outside in the gorgeous weather to get some studying done. I did manage to read a 100 page chapter on wound care (it's as thrilling as it sounds) before I got distracted and started cleaning and moving things around (mainly my plants from inside to out).

Being the good doggy mom I am I took Stetson on yet another walk before dinner. My dog definitely does not like taking walks- especially on leashes. When he hears walk all he wants is free time to pee and poo on as many things as possible before nothing more comes out; when I say walk I'm thinking moving at a quick pace going as far as I can before I'm bored. Needless to say this disagreement proceeds with me walking and dragging a 60 pound dog 5 feet behind me for 30 minutes. Sigh.

After the walk I made some pizza (see people, I'm not jumping completely into the no processed foods diet) and then spent about 2 hours on the phone with my PSODL. Speaking of, I cannot wait for Alister to come home for the summer. It will be our first chance to really spend time together while still doing normal everyday life things (work, school, etc). I think it will be a good thing- at least I hope it is seeing as though we're trying to marry each other eventually. Time together is good. Very good. Not done enough.

Once we got off the phone I bummed around on FB for a little while, kicked some huge ass on Guitar Hero (okay so I'm still on easy but at least I get a lot of 99%'s), and then settled down with some popcorn and an oddly tasting mixed drink to watch "Get Smart" with Steve Carrell...too bad the Netflix DVD is too scratched up to watch. Now Harry Potter is playing and I'm reminded of how (dorkily) excited I am for the 6th one to come out this summer. :-)

Hopefully I accomplish more tomorrow b/c the 3 tests are coming quickly and I'd like to be able to run home to Raleigh for a day next weekend to see George and Ann...who I haven't seen in years....maybe?

Friday, April 17, 2009

TGIF- Highlights

Today is Friday! Yay! Not really...it just means the start of a short weekend crammed full of studying...I mean learning. I have 3 exams next week followed by a week and a half of cumulative exams. I know, everyone be jealous. Anyways, I figured doing highlights of the week would be a quick way to sum up everything, so here goes (and I take the bad with the good so this includes some of each and yes, I know my life is not the most thrilling ever):
  • Sunday I got to enjoy Easter with the family and laugh at Alex while she attempted to set up a sewing machine (and I think in the end Super Joe actually did it). Oh and my Dad washed my car for me...that was nice of him. I always figured the excessive rain would do it for me.
  • I spent 5 hours Monday in the operating room watching C-section after C-section after C-section...I went to bed with visions of vagina's and huge uterus' filling my head (not really a good thing).
  • Tuesday was the simulation experience in the lab in which some of my fellow students quickly proved they will probably get sued or fired as future nurses and reminded me how important personal liability insurance is.
  • Wednesday I had my last 2 lecture periods with 2 of my more favorite teachers. I still have exams with them next week but I will miss Dr. Neil and her Malaise (okay, well until I have her again this summer online).
  • Thursday I pulled off a 108 on my pathophys exam. That was a nice boost for my smartness ego.
  • Today I studied my bum off for a lung/heart/bowel sounds quiz in health assessment only to have my teacher give everyone that took it a 100. Sigh. I also went to WalMart and didn't get shot. That was nice.

Oh, and my clinical instructor gave me an "excellent" on the absurdly long case study she made me do last week. Did I mention it was long? Absurdly so? It was. I was surprised seeing as though I think she's out to get me b/c ironically I always get the patients whose faces appear in the dictionary next to "polypharmacy". Thank goodness this coming Monday is my last full clinical day (and yes, my patient is on twice as many meds as anyone else's). Semester is almost over...just a little longer.

Wednesday, April 15, 2009

It's a female thing

...so of you're a male you can always stop reading here.

A little over a year ago I decided to try going off of birth control. Although I dropped 20 pounds, became happier, less hungry, and saved money I also experienced some moderately severe cystic acne on my lower face. I suffered from acne in high school but never had cysts like I did last year. Needless to say, I wasn't interested in looking like a package of cottage cheese so I went to a dermatologist for suggestions. Unfortunately she had only 2 options: birth control or Accutane. Well make that 1 option; I sucked it up and went on Accutane back in high school and even though it dried everything up, made my hair fall out, and destroyed my innards, it cleared up my face to the point of looking and feeling like a baby's behind. Because of that though, I wasn't given the option of going on it again (for further info see FDA website). Which leaves me with birth control. Sigh.

The dermatologist offered to start me on a newer (3rd generation) birth control by the name of Yaz. Yaz is one of the few birth control pills out there that is prescribed for acne. The downfall is that it contains a diuretic which can cause high potassium (yet help prevent bloating ie weight gain). I figured I'd give it a try even though insurance really doesn't like paying for it. Within a few months my acne had cleared right up, but on the flip side I ended up being part of the 10% of people that develop high potassium (google hyperkalemia) and got to enjoy constant muscle twitches and leg cramps. But the acne was gone so I stayed on it.

Skip to a year later...okay yesterday. I finally gave in and went off the Yaz...and off bc pills in general. One reason, and it's a good one, is that I'm getting close to 30 and as many people may or may not know, the older you get the more risks you incur while taking oral contraceptives. I have now worked with enough stroke, heart attack, and patients with clots to know that I am not interested in becoming part of that population. I realize that bc pills are not the only risk factors for the above issues but they definitely play a part. I was also tired of having twitchy legs everytime I wanted to enjoy a baked potato...and my God I missed peanut butter and banana sandwiches. On the down side, I'm afraid the cystic acne is going to come back full force.

So- I've been doing some reading (ie peer reviewed research articles b/c let's be honest, Wikipedia isn't perfect) and have found research that links several foods to acne (mainly due to toxins or food allergies). Since your skin is an organ and "bad" things exit your body partially through the skin, it does make sense that toxins or allergens could cause skin problems even if they were originally digested. That being said, I am about to embark on a diet of absolutely no dairy, no caffeine, limited alcohol (come on now- I need my champagne), and limited refined foods (good bye white bread and pasta) in addition to lots of yummy water. It may help, it may not. If not I'll be back to twitchy legs by the end of the year. At the very least I would have adapted a healthier eating lifestyle for at least a little while.

For anyone interested, I'll let you know how that works out. For those that have never had acne and could care less, well, go get fat or something. :-)

Tuesday, April 14, 2009

Scary nursing students

In order to practice some nursing skills, our labs will occasionally do "simulation scenarios" which are composed of several roles (primary nurse, secondary nurse, family member, etc) with a dummy as the patient. The dummy is not just a dummy however, she can talk (via the instructors behind the one way mirror that control everything), she has a monitor which shows adjustable vital signs, she has multiple wounds, she can have an IV/catheter/NG tube inserted, and you can listen to heart and lung sounds on her. So although she's a dummy she's a really jacked up one.

Today in lab our scenario involved wound care (culturing and changing a dressing). I got to be an observer since I was the primary nurse for the previous scenario so my only job was to observe and write down the good and the bad. I filled an entire page with ONE good and the rest bad. Yes, it was that bad. And that's scary b/c we are at the end of our first semester and this is basic stuff. Rather than get into all of the silly details I will just say that the girls playing the nurses not only got the vital signs wrong and ignored the fact that she couldn't breathe (O2 went down) but they CHANGED THE WRONG WOUND. Yes. The wrong wound. The "physician's orders" specifically said the one on the backside and they changed the one on her leg.

I don't know about other people but I don't think I want either of those girls ever touching a wound on my body. Actually...there's a quite a few people I'm in school with that I don't ever want to touch me in a healthcare setting. It's scary.

Aside from that fun, interesting, scary experience today, school is as always. There are 2 weeks left + exams and the teachers are piling the crap on. In the next 2 weeks I have 4 tests, 2 quizzes, a research paper, and a final lab check off followed by a week of 5 cumulative exams. Sigh. I also had a brief freak out today when I found out that my private loan company is no longer doing private loans (thanks to Obama not helping them out like all the other fools and wanting all the federal aid to go to poor income families). I luckily was able to find ONE company that offered what I needed (thank you Wells Fargo) so I think I'll be okay until I graduate. But still, the last thing people in school should be worrying about is how to pay for it. Jobs wants people with good degrees so in my opinion, there should be no barrier to people getting those degrees. Still, just my opinion.

I'm also disappointed that I won't be able to go home Thursday for my grandma's graveside service, but I have a test at the same time as the service and although I would be able to make it up, it's the time of the semester when you do not want to get behind in anything. I'll be there in spirit since I'm usually not there in spirit in patho class. Hopefully I'll be there for the memorial service early summer, although if family members keep pushing it back I'll be back in school for the fall before it ever happens!

Musings

I blog for myself...not to entertain or amuse anyone else (or make them glad they have their life and not mine) but to have a place to write down random thoughts and feelings. It really doesn't bother me if no one reads it, but I have to admit it makes me kind of sad when someone outright says they don't want to read it for whatever reason. Why even tell me? Why not just not read it? Why is it necessary to make someone feel bad about themselves by shooting them down?

Why? Why? WHY????

And why do I have 500 pages to read by next week? That sucks too.

Monday, April 13, 2009

Oh my uterus

I just wrote a nice long blog on my OR experiences today (they made me watch a bunch of c-sections) but after re-reading it I realized that most people probably wouldn't enjoy my commentary on the experience based solely on the fact that everyone out there wants or has kids aside from me. So rather than ruffle any feathers, I will just say that I went (I didn't have a choice), I saw (quite a few HUGE uterus' and vaginas), and then I came home thankful that the only thing in my belly was a ham sandwich and some lemonade.

Sunday, April 12, 2009

Easter

And on a much lighter note than my earlier rant and rave, I had a nice Easter break despite needing to do a lot of studying (which I still have yet to do). I ended up going to Raleigh yesterday afternoon through this afternoon to visit family and enjoyed getting to see my immediate family as well as Pat and Joyce. We had a late lunch at Applebee's surrounded by a brief visit before Pat and Joyce headed back to WS.

I did spent ~4 hours yesterday on a case study my clinical instructor decided to punish me with but that was about it for school work. This morning my family went to the sunrise service at church and boy was it chilly...and smoky (no one was tending the increasingly smoky bonfire). But, it was nice to do something as a family and church tends to keep everyone relaxed.

When we got back home (after stopping at Krispy Kreme for fresh HOT doughnuts), Alex and I split some triple chocolate cake (compliments of Bud and Alice) covered in heavy whipping cream along with some champagne (it would have been mimosa's but we were out of orange juice). The family just puttered around inside and out and shortly before I left we had some honey baked ham, green beans, Hawaiin rolls, and mac n' cheese (compliments of Kenny's recipe).

I left for Greenville (YAY!!!) around 2 and stopped by my house on the way in to pick up some mail. The IRS sent me a large packet and at first I thought I was getting audited...but it ends up I didn't sign all of my forms. Yeah, so next year I'm definitely filing electronically although I may not have worked any jobs to pay taxes on. We'll see.

So now it's back to the grind and the long haul to get through with this semester. There's only 3 weeks left + exams and then I will have survived first semester...and not dropped out. Shocking right? The people-hater is slowly making it through nursing school. :-)

Let's just get this out there...

I understand that people have opinions. I feel that people are welcome to those opinions regardless of whether or not I agree with them. But as a bitch, even I understand that there are times when the opinions are just not welcome nor necessary to share. Clarification? Sure.

YES. I HAVE BEEN ENGAGED BEFORE. Oh my God...I think I'm the only person in the WORLD who has ever been engaged more than once. Guess that makes me an icon of relationship failure. Actually, NO. It doesn't. It means I was smart enough and mature enough to realize that the person I was engaged to was not the right one for me. Rather than jump into a marriage (ie lifelong commitment to another person) I got out of it before it became that kind of commitment. I wasn't interested in separating a year later, or spending years avoiding the person I lived with, or regretting my decision for the rest of my life and therefore living a sad, lonely existence. Maybe I shouldn't have gotten engaged in the first place. MAYBE. But I made myself one less divorce statistic by getting out before I got in too deep.

Which leads me to, I am so SICK and TIRED of the snarky "joking" comments that people have made. "Are you actually going to stick with this one?" "Congratulations for the third or fourth time" "Well maybe this one will actually stick" "Somebody better warn him about your relationship issues"

SERIOUSLY? How hard is it for grown, supposedly mature, adults to just be NICE and say congratulations??? I don't care if you go home and talk smack about me. I don't care if the entire time you're thinking "Oh that idiot is going to back out again"...b/c trust me, I think some pretty bad stuff about people but I'm mature enough to keep it within the confines of my own cranium. I really don't care what people think except when they feel the need to say it to ME. Why is it so hard to just let me be happy and enjoy my engagement...b/c believe it or not, I too am hoping this one will work out.

So just to sum things up, if anyone feels the need to say anything other than congratulations and when's the wedding, then trust me, if you say it TO ME (or to Alister), you will no longer be a welcome part of my life.

Thanks for reading and Happy Easter.

Thursday, April 9, 2009

The Top Five...

...Things I Have Learned In Nursing School:
  1. Don't smoke
  2. Don't get fat
  3. Exercise
  4. Eat healthy and drink lots of fluids that don't include alcohol
  5. Even if you do all of the above, if you live in wonderful NC, you will still get hypertension, diabetes, heart disease, cancer, or have a stroke...and get kidney stones from all of the Bojangles sweet tea

Lesson for the day: Life is short. Eat, drink, smoke, tan, be happy b/c no matter what, you are probably already screwed.